BAM, the cars in front of me screeched to a halt. Yet another car crash had happened further up the line. "Agh" I moaned loudly "I really need to get to work, this can't be happening now. What a great way to start my day looking through the smog at these power plants for a couple of hours" I sat back and tried to close my eyes. I couldn't, the clanging coming from the millions of factories in the distance was too loud. I was starting to get annoyed as there was nothing for me to do, I looked out the window and stared into the scorched pasture. "Ha" I laughed to myself "So much for nuke the Aliens its the best option."
This is a story not a description, you have not used a simile at all. SPG errors 5. This story engaged me but in was not what the teacher asked.
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